Wednesday, December 17, 2008

10 things

Today as I boarded a rather crowded E train (thanks Keisha K for the ride) I managed to find a seat withing seconds. It was in the two seaters, and the man sitting there was rather slim so I was ready to celebrate, PAUSE. No this ride was hellish to say the least, so starting with that jacka$$ here are the top 10 things that I hated about my ride this morning:

The jerk guy sitting next to me with his legs wide open (even after I sat down), Hell we get it already your junk needs to breathe. But since you didn't pay two fares, close your legs or stand up!

The jerk guy sitting next to me with his hands in his side coat pockets, DUDE we are on a heated train and it is actually rather hot! If your hands are cold get some damn gloves, because my ribs are not that interested in being intimate with your elbows (Yes these were my exact words to him after the 2nd time I had to move his arms)

And for real if you take that IPOD out one more time, its going to be on!

Anyone that watches a pregnant woman or a man with a young child get on the train and not offer them your seat. WTH is with you people? I can have on 4 inch heels feet killing me after being on my feet all day and I forget that when I see a a woman/man with kids. YES I gave the pregnant woman my seat, after I warned her about the jerk guys elbows.

Hey Mr. NY Times the entire seated section does not want to read your paper. Fold the paper and act like you've been on the train before

Mr/Mrs Desperate for a seat, if you enter the train car and notice that 90% of the passengers are on the opposite side, take the hint!Don't go sit next to the homeless man, then storm through the crowded section, screaming he "Stinks". DUMB ASS

Hey Mr Stiff as a board, They call people that ride the trains Strap hangers for a reason, HOLD ON! because I danced all last night, and since I don't have a hat down on the ground I'd prefer you stop stomping all over my feet like this is our dance. ~ shuffle ball change

Crazy dude screaming at no one and everyone. There is no reason for all of that, if you and your voices are having a disagreement and need an arbitrator there is a place for you. However you are on the wrong train, that would be the A/C to that hospital. Or just take the medicine you and your voice seem to be arguing about taking.

Sleeping while standing is hard enough but damn near impossible on a moving train. So Dude please wake up, I already have one dance partner, see Mr Stiff as a board.

Mr/Mrs mouthing words to me across the train:
Mr/Mrs: Do you have the time?
Me: Yes
HAHA, ok maybe that is me being a tad cheeky, but that is the right response to the question. I do have the time and you know I do because you can see my watch. Now if you would like to know what time it is just ask... hehehe

Lastly, I just hate the MTA. They are talking about raising fares 28%, and that is just insane. Every year they have deficit but the trains are slow, delayed and just plain old terrible EVERY DAY! I heard the news give the C train a rating of a C- and that was good, huh what? In school that wasn't a grade to celebrate (unless it was statistics then jump for joy)

So there you go 10 things for this week. My fellow NYers feel free to add more if you like.


Keith said...

LMAO @ You.....but I feel you, I ride the Subway and the comuter trains, three out of five days a week and I go through the same thing. (Thursdays and Fridays, I treat myself..I drive to work..It's
worth the $10.00 for parking in the
lot..I get to hear my music,laugh at Steve Harvey and I always got a

F.U. said...

Did you say shuffle ball change?! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I cosign all of your 10 things. Especially the jackass with the elbows. Why must there always be a jackass with elbows on a crowded ass train?!

DollFace said...

And the church says, AMEN!!!

The other day I had this Dominican (he was cute though) trying to holla...but did not speak a LICK of English. Kept raising his shirt so I could see his tummy though But you can't talk my panties off if I don't understand the language...LOL

Mizrepresent said...

Hey girl, even though i'm not in NYC, i feel ya...i used to ride the public transport here and witnessed very much the same...thank God for the EXPRESS bus, luxury, like Greyhound at transit it's best!

Cherish said...

ok so im a new reader and i love these lists. i have rode the train since i was in high school and even then i knew if i saw an older person, pregnant woman or anyone with a small child you should automatically offer ur seat.

Ms. SoChic said...

Hey I'm a new reader too and gurl don't get me started on the guy who wants to have his iPods volume on ten thousand so everyone hears it. Explain to me the purpose of your headphones. Oh and the guy who stands on the door blocking the entrance because he wants to secure his spot by the door. Move in dude, I want a seat not the door. Child see you got me started now. LOL!!!