Friday, September 30, 2011

She is a dancehall queen for life.

Yesterday I was in the mood to relive my dancehall queen days and Spotify was there to help. I sat in the office singing and chair wining to my favorites from Buju Banton and terror fabulous and thought see how great dancehall use to be. Then Red dragon came on and I was over the top excited because I could see the smoke filled party, canei bottles  and young me  dancing and laughing. It was like a quantum leap back to the 90s, this was my jam! And right as I started singing my Adult self screamed ," WTF  are you singing, are you listening?"  so I stopped and did just that and.....Oh my word!

How in the hell do I have teeth because surely if my mom heard me singing "If your crotches never fail you yet, I want you pop your vagina." she would have slapped the taste and teeth out of my mouth. I remember being about 15 singing  a song called "kill the bitch " my mom rushed into the living room screaming so how did she miss this one? Very easy she never heard it. That got me thinking about CJ and how I always say he better not do blah blah blah in my house.  It's just empty talk I guess because he won't do it in  my house,  he'll be out with friends and I'll be none the wiser just like my mom. On some levels I'm not okay with this,  but I'm a realist and know that's just the way it works. I guess if  this trash that passes for music now didn't  gives me a headache after two seconds I could monitor more but it does.   I will just have to make it clear that these are song and if he ever speaks to a girl in that manner I will end his life.....IMMEDIATELY! *what, too much?*

Anyway it's Friday, so slackness is in order. Here are some of my favorite inappropriate dancehall songs from my youth. So cock up your batty and ride and enjoy the flashback. #ahthegoodtimes

*SM why was I singing this song* 

This is the song that inspired this post. 

oh so yeah I was really jamming talking about Bum flick pon mi dick. LOL I still love this song though. 

I'm going to leave it there, the amount of slackness is too much for one post.  

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

From the mouth of babes

This morning my friend Fawzilla sent me a great video and I thought I'd share it with you. This girl is awesome, Sure it's scripted and she probably doesn't know what half of what she is saying means BUT these are questions some of you ADULTS are too scared to ask.

My favorites:

Do you need this to wipe your hands, you've got blood on them.
Wanna go fight the power with me later?

LOL! I mean and the faces on these white men... PRICELESS.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Beres Hammond makes everything better

I've posted this song before when I was stressed but today when I heard it I REALLY HEARD IT! Every lyric and so I decided to post again. This song says it all.

It's either you're in or out
gotta know what you're all about
Be bold and strong
Tell yourself you're not doing wrong

Once you're in you've got to take it
Make your mind up son and face it
Because Warriors don't cry

I know lots of folks will hate you
and not because they want to 
but sometimes they don't even know why.

So don't watch the crowd
Their duty is to be loud
Believe in what you're doing 
and feel proud
Cause when you fall along the way
People will have lots to say
They don't even care if you make it through the day

either you're in or out
gotta know what you're all about
Be bold and strong
Tell yourself you're not doing wrong

There is no true friend when you're hungry
Not if he is hungry too
At time you can't rely
Because the same brother 
Will send you with the offer
Yes feels good and set him right

So don't watch the crowd
Their duty is to be loud
Believe in what you're doing 
and feel proud.
Cause when you fall along the way
People will have lots to say
They don't really care if you make it through the day

either you're in or out
gotta know what you're all about
Be bold and strong
Tell yourself you're not doing wrong (2xs)

Once you're in be prepared to take it
Make up son and face it cause 
Warriors don't cry.

I know lots of folks will hate you
and not because they want to 
but sometimes they don't even know why.

So don't watch the crowd
Their duty is to be loud
Believe in what you're doing 
and feel proud
Cause when you fall along the way
People will have lots to say
They don't even care if you make it through the day

The Great Weight loss debate.

This morning after my daily routine of Yoga, shower and morning Joe (the show not coffee) I caught a glimpse of weight watchers Jennifer hudson commercial. I heard via twitter that she dropped to a size zero but I had not seen her. I don't care one way or another about J.HUD and her ever shrinking waist, but I do think the message that is being sent out is dangerous.
 When her campaign launched I thought this is a good thing because she was a curvy girl, like many mothers, aunties that littleblack girls look at everyday. Her message of healthy curves would not only get our girls thinking about weight maintenance but their parents too, all of which is a win.But somewhere along the way that message turned into what we've always heard, Skinny is the way you make it in this world.

*Before I go on I am fully aware that there are some that mask their unhealthy weight and size with saying they are curvy I'm not speaking of them and if your intentions are to please move on to another blog.*

I've never struggled with my weight and I believe that come from my mother blessing me with the  knowledge that people come in all sizes, and mines just happened to be all of 90lbs. I was always active and even as I got older I just liked working out. I learned to love the rush of endorphins way before I knew how to spell it, and not much has changed. However growing up my family was full of women with behinds, big breast, hips and they were healthy, and I was the string bean.  So I guess it never occurred to me that any of this wasn't the norm. In my world Black women were built that way and we were okay with it.

It wasn't until 1992 that I  started paying attention to weight loss/maintenance issues  because I was now surrounded by more than just people that looked like me. I weighed in at an entire 92lbs straight though college, and people paid attention to it. Sophomore year one of my best friends mom even suggested that I didn't eat because she could see the bones in my face, all I knew of eating disorders was that there were lots of ABC specials about them, none of which featured Black girls.  Freshman year in "my Women's bodies, women wisdom" class we read an article that suggested that African American women battled less with eating disorders and weight issues. When asked if I thought that was true I had to agree because I didn't know any Black women that had suffered from it, we just seemed to more comfortable and realized that we weren't all going to be a size zero.

Looking back I'm sure that article was a little off , but it does seem that little girls do battle with these things more often now. Some of the battle stems from the pressure society puts on everyone to be rail thin (which is unrealistic) and this need to be the next Rihanna or ( insert any pop star). I look back at who I idolized as a child and the goal to be like them was more tangible. I would have been a kick ass version of Big Lez or Assata Shakur Lol. But more importantly I had my mom, grandmother and aunts to look up to and they were better  than any TV personality ever could be.

I will say that I do love what Beyonce did to promote healthier living, it wasn't about weight loss at all but more about getting up and moving which combined with healthy eating leads to healthy living. 

So what do we do to the rest of us do to help little girls with self image? I know that Tyra has a camp that focuses on just that but what do the rest of us do. I have conversations with my nieces as do their moms and you hope that it rubs off onto the people they are in contact with but hoping is just not enough.

This is my favorite quote on weight loss: 
When friends tell you how awesome you look, drop the "I still have more to go" crap.  You worked hard and you deserve the compliment!  ~Jillian Michaels

Monday, September 12, 2011

How Could I Ever Forget

When I started this post I had every intention of telling my 9/11 story, but as I wrote the emotions flooded back in and I decided it was best that I didn't. At least not in great detail. I've been blogging for 4 years and people have asked why I never share it because it could be healing to some, what they forget is that it is hurtful to me, On this day, I make a conscious decision to  shut down all social media, TV and radio because the stories shared FORCE me to relive it all and honestly I just don't want to.

I was there, I stood in front of those towers, I saw it live and in person and because of that I WILL never forget! My life changed that day like many New Yorkers, but with all the despair that surrounded me I bonded with people I loved, solidifying friendships for a lifetime. I vowed never to leave my home angry and never to be so petty that I leave the Mr. without saying I  Love You. This is what I choose to remember about that day. Sharing the parts that catapult me into deep sadness yearly just doesn't seem necessary.
I'm not suggesting that others don't share their story because we all heal differently and it's your story to share, but my story is one I am choosing to hold close to guard with my heart.  Maybe as CJ gets older and he is begins to understand what actually happened on that day I will pass it on to him but until that day I  just pray that the world changes.

I listen to this song every year since that day, it reminds me to appreciate the men and women that lost their lives and gave their lives to help others.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Kindergarten here we come!

Count my numbers 1,2,3
I can even write my name with ease
Aren't you very proud of me.
Kindergarten here we come (here we come)
Kindergarten here we come (here we come)
So long Pre-K it's been fun.
Kindergarten here we come! ~ C.J 

This morning CJ started his journey to "Big Boys School" and he could not have been happier. He woke up early, got dressed twice (he didn't want to wear his blazer), ate breakfast and called his grandma to sing the wheels on the bus. She seemed very happy about that. As we waited for the bus (hence the song) in the rain I realized (AGAIN) that my little boy is growing up and that I don't much care for it. He jumped on that bus like he has been riding alone for years. I was shocked, just a peace sign and he was out. LOL

 He's FIVE and before I know it, he will be Six then SIXTEEN *faints* and all I can do is sit back and enjoy the ride. None of this makes any sense because you know from birth that your kids will get older, I knew at 2 he's be taller than me, that he'd date all that stuff but as the bus pulled away that shit hit home.

He's fiercely independent and I wouldn't want him to be like other kids crying and not wanting to let go but sometimes I do. #Dontjudgeme. Man this mothering this is making me soft, let me log off and get some work done so that when his bus pulls up I can have his snack ready.
Oh I'd like to say I didn't cry until one of the nuns said "Just like when you bring your child to be baptized and they are called by their names we will call them by name as you bring them forward" TEARS MAN! Not as many as my sister but definitely TEARS SON! 

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Stop the Violence

*I wanted to write a post talking about what a great time I had at the Labor Day Parade in my beloved Brooklyn.
* I wanted to tell you all about the amazing colors and all the happiness that surrounded us.
* I wanted to share with you about the culture, the music, and brag about all the delicious food we had.
*I wanted to say that it was the best time I've had on that street in a long time

And even though all of this is True (I had a great time with @TheJadedNYer, her daughter N, @WriteinBK and CJ) something else weighs heavy on my heart. THE VIOLENCE! This weekend 43 people were killed in a 48hr period, though not all in Brooklyn a LARGE number of them were. A police officer was shot after the parade, as were two men after the parade was over. I don't like to attach all the violence to the parade (several of the shooting were no where near the parade route) but the media does and so it becomes the Labor day parade shootings. And without fail SOMETHING happens every year!
I don't understand it! Why is a day that's suppose to be fun, and all about love and unity ALWAYS ends in violence?

As I read the different accounts of what happened this weekend I felt sick to my stomach. And then I read the comments (which everyone knows I don't do) and that only made it worse. Why don't these kids understand that their actions send us back hundreds of years? Why are the kids today so ready to end their lives and others over a 5 second argument? It breaks my heart. It just seems like no one believes in walking away or just shooting the fair one and moving on! So desensitized by music and movies that glorifies a fast life, with fast endings.

Those of us over 30 remember the Stop the Violence movement and why it was so necessary. Is it possible that we've just crossed back into that time where life, Black life is just that worthless. I don't know how we go about solving this problem again and giving these kids some sense of self worth, but what I do I know is if this keeps up the only place you will be able to hear Soca will be in your homes. The Parade and J'ouvert  will be no more. Just another loss to Black culture.

Friday, September 2, 2011

It's Labor Day Weekend

Labor day was created by the labor movement and is dedicated to the social and economic achievements of American workers. We all get a rest and a day off. Most Americans will be out in their yards BBQing, drinking and celebrating their official day off,  but not the people of Brooklyn!

Labor day in the BEST city looks like this:

*Pictures are property of the WIADCA, visit their site for information*
And oh don't get me started on all the food (all my favorites that I won't be able to have)! This weekend will be nothing but fun. I haven't been to the parade in a few years now because after doing it EVERY summer since I was 16 I needed a break. But I will be meeting up with a few people this year to jump and wave! Come out and see me.

*I bet The Jaded NYer doesn't think I can move like Jagger to Soca, she'd be wrong though* 

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Oh the places you'll go!

This post is dedicated to my best friend Dee, she's having one of those big girl moments that deserve yeahs and hoorays and what better way to celebrate than with Dr. Seuss. I read this book to CJ at least twice a week and he loves it. I also find that it helps me when I'm not my brainiest or sure footed! 

 I was going to make side comments but I'll save that for another day! ENJOY! 

Oh, the Places You'll Go!

by Dr. Seuss

Congratulations! Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places! You're off and away!
You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You're on your own.  And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

You'll look up and down streets.  Look 'em over with care.
About some you will say, "I don't choose to go there."
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you're too smart to go down any not-so-good street.

And you may not find any you'll want to go down.
In that case, of course, you'll head straight out of town.
It's opener there in the wide open air.
Out there things can happen and frequently do
to people as brainy and footsy as you.

And when things start to happen, don't worry.  Don't stew.
Just go right along. You'll start happening too.

You'll be on your way up! You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers who soar to high heights.
You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don't Because, sometimes, you won't.
I'm sorry to say so but, sadly, it's true
and Hang-ups can happen to you.
You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on. You'll be left in a Lurch.

You'll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then, that you'll be in a Slump.
And when you're in a Slump, you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted.  But mostly they're darked.
A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out?  Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place...

...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.

That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
You'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.

With banner flip-flapping,
once more you'll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you're that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored.  there are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame!  You'll be famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don't.
Because, sometimes, they won't.
I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Games you can't win
'cause you'll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not,
Alone will be something
you'll be quite a lot.

And when you're alone, there's a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.

But on you will go
though the weather be foul
On you will go
though your enemies prowl
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike
and I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)


be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!